Maybe I’m a helicopter parent? I don’t know. I hope not. I hope that my grown children won’t look back at their childhood and think “mom was on top of us ALL THE TIME.” But I am on top of them all the time. I am constantly available to them. For any reason. I don’t leave them alone to play. I don’t even allow them to play alone together without supervision. And, sometimes, I have to remind myself to back-off a little. To let them interact…at all. My lovelies, I think I might be paranoid, but this is Why I Supervise My Children So Closely. And, maybe you will, too, after you hear why I do…
Why I Supervise My Children So Closely
- I Would Rather Blame Myself. Because, if something happened when I wasn’t supervising children (because it’s not hard). If one of them fell or got hurt by accident and I thought another kid was responsible…well, let’s just say I’d MUCH rather blame myself than one of my other children or someone else’s kids. And I don’t want any other parent blaming my kids either. If I’m there, I know what happened–and I can place blame on me for not avoiding a potential accident.
- Abuse of Children by Children is Real. Abuse by an abuser that’s also a child is a fact. It’s not a joke. It’s not something that I THINK. It’s real. It happened to me. Multiple times. By two boys. And a girl. This wasn’t bullying or physical abuse–it was sexual. And I was 5 the first time. F-I-V-E. Guess how old my abuser was? Five. So…there’s that. And all it would have taken was a teacher paying attention the three or four times he had me cornered…so, there’s also THAT.
- One Time = Failure. All it takes is ONE time of one of my kids being involved in something considered to be BORDERLINE inappropriate behavior and I will believe that not only have I failed as a parent, but that I’ve failed the kiddos involved by being lazy–which is like a slap in the face for me. And I just can’t let that happen. I don’t fail. I am driven. I accomplish what I plan to do. And I will NOT fail at this parenting thing. I will be a good mom. Period. In this, I will not fail. I just can’t allow myself to let that happen.
- All It Takes Is One Time. They will be scarred by abuse, should it happen just one time. And if it did, I would have a hard time accepting that I let it happen, that I allowed them to be abused. And statistics say that abuse can happen within a family more often than it does from outside (though my own experience was all from the outside). This makes me cringe. That one sibling might scar another for life in a way so profound. Nope, not on my watch. Even one time.
So, I mean, what do you think? Now, keep in mind that I have a 13 year old son with behavioral issues and two toddler/baby girls. So, maybe my situation is just crazy unique? But I don’t think it is. And I don’t think I’m wrong. But I welcome feedback. Leave me a comment below or find me on Facebook…I’d love to hear your thoughts on supervising children closely.