I’m done being judged–and if you choose to, just know, I am a Shitty Parent and I don’t Care what your opinion is–because I’m still a good mom.
The truth is, we’re all shitty parents from time to time.
It isn’t so much that we don’t care about our children, but the fact that people judge parents for Every.
Single.
Thing.
You could be the best parent in the entire world, but someone is going to have SOMETHING to say about your parenting skills.
So to the lady who looked at me like I was the wicked witch of the west when I whisper-yelled at my daughter in the store last week; or the guy who said “it’s too cold to be out without a jacket, little girl”; or the lady who glared at me as my kid ran past her at the park…y’all, I am a shitty parent, and I don’t care!
I am a Shitty Parent and I don’t Care (What You Think)
Know My Kids Are Loved
My kids know I love them. Each day, I tell them I love them, I show them I love them, and I hold them in my arms an absurd amount.
As a parent, I would do anything in the world for my children. I would stand in front of a bullet to save their lives–literally.
There is nothing I have ever felt quite like the love of my kids.
However, I may not always show my love the way another thinks I should. I yell at my kids because I want them to grow up to be respectable members of society.
I may discipline my children differently. I may do time-outs or I might *gasp* make them clean up their own messes.
I do these things because I love my children. So if that makes me a shitty parent then, I am a shitty parent and I don’t care.
Know My Kids Are Always Taken Care Of
My kids get three meals a day. Or more–I never deny them food when they ask.
They have clothes on their backs and shoes on their feet.
They have a bed to sleep in with comforters and pillows.
I make sure they get to the doctor when they need to go.
I take them to school. I provide what they need when they need it.
However, one of those three meals that day might be Pb&J, chicken nuggets, or some other incredibly easy meal I can whip up in 5-minutes.
I may not take care of my kids the way another does.
I may not buy them name brand clothing to play in the yard with or take them to the doctor for every little sniffle.
If that makes me a shitty parent, then I am a shitty parent and I don’t care.
No Doubt, My Kids Always Come Before Me
Every job I take; every move I make; everything I do, I make sure my kids come before me.
If that means I eat less so they can have more, I will (because my youngest REALLY loves crawfish, that means I’m making a big sacrifice sometimes).
If that means I work a 9-5 that I hate to put dinner on the table, I do it. Their needs will always come before my needs.
However, sometimes I need a break.
Sometimes I need to go out. Sometimes, I need to drop my kids off at my mom’s and have a drink. Yes, *gasp* an alcoholic beverage.
You know why?
Because, being a parent is damn stressful! So, if that makes me a shitty parent, then I am a shitty parent and I don’t care.
To My Delight, My Kids Have More than They Need
My kids may have everything they need, but they are also a tad bit spoiled.
You see, we have TVs galore, DVDs, games, tablets, computers, and that’s just the half of it. My kids don’t need for anything, but they also don’t want for much either.
Although my kids have all these really great things, sometimes I let them have too much screen time.
Some days, I use those screens as a babysitter so I can catch up on laundry, make a nice dinner, or get some of the housework done.
Sometimes, I let them sit on them for hours just to have a break.
If that makes me a shitty parent, then I am a shitty parent and I don’t care.
I am Deeply Involved in My Kids Education
I try very hard to make it to every school function for my kids.
I want to be the person who volunteers for field trips. I want to be the mom who is at the school constantly. I want to bring in homemade cookies for the class.
Sometimes, I can do and be all of those things.
Other times, I can’t even read a 10-minute book with my kids.
Sometimes, homework goes out the window.
Many times, just getting my kids to and from school is an accomplishment.
So, if that makes me a shitty parent, then, I am a shitty parent and I don’t care.
Your Judgey Opinion Doesn’t Matter to Me EVER
What matters is that my kids are human and they’re allowed to be human.
I’m not raising robots–I’m raising people who make their own decisions. Hopefully with more understanding and clarity than I make my own.
See, I did (and still do) a lot of things “because my mom said so” and while that worked for me and my personality–I don’t think it’s what works for my two kiddos.
So, I’m tailoring my parenting to meet their needs.
They want to run wild sometimes and and blow that energy out–I apologize if you get a little blow-back when they run past. If it’s cold and they want to go without a jacket–I just make sure they have long sleeves, but if they’re adamant about the jacket, I let it go.
And if I REEEEEALLY need them to stop being the world’s craziest PITAs, I’m going to whisper-yell at them–It’s not like I’m BEATING them, or even full-out yelling.
Gimme a break, here, I’m doing the best I know how.
And if that makes me a shitty parent in your opinion, you’re being a judgey jerk and I just frankly don’t care.
In the end, the world sees what it wants to see, and sometimes, you may be the world’s best parent while other days, you are just a shitty parent.
As long as your kids are healthy, happy and loved, you are doing a good job!
So, if you are a shitty parent, join all the other shitty parents, and don’t care!