Nerdy Mamma

Everything You Need to Throw a Basketball Party and a Recipe for Dairy-Free Creamy Jalapeno Ranch Dip

Thank you for sharing!

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This post is not medical advice.

March college basketball game-time is coming…MARCH COLLEGE BASKETBALL GAME-TIME IS COMING! At my house, since I’m not preggers and about to pop (like last year), that means that we’re totally throwing a party…and I have Everything You Need to Throw a Basketball Party and a Recipe for Dairy-Free Creamy Jalapeno Ranch Dip. Yup. This is me. Prepared for madness. LOL!

I want to be prepared for EVERYTHING at my party. And by everything–I mean: prepared for it all. Even that moment of heartburn I tend to have when I get all anxious as the timer ticks down…Of course, every day, I take Nexium 24HR, the new #1 selling frequent heartburn brand* (*Based on IRI sales data 52 weeks ending 11/1/15 among OTC brands. May take 1 to 4 days for full effect. Use as directed.). So I don’t have heartburn problems any more–but if my guests hit the party table and all it’s spicy glory, I want to be ready. Nobody would hate to be a downer…so I put them on the table so nobody even has to ask.

To get this party off right, I hit my local Walmart (pssst….big secret: I got EVERYTHING I needed from there…so, there’s that) and picked-up a few things, including some Nexium, because the last thing I wanted was to be unprepared and have a bunch of people with heartburn (including myself) when we hit halftime.

Everything You Need to Throw a Basketball Party

Recipe for Dairy-Free Creamy Jalapeno Ranch Dip

This is one of those recipes that you really can’t run with scissors, but here’s a photo tutorial anyway, because I know you’re a glutton for photo tutorials…heh.

For those of you who can’t guess what I just did there…

Yield: 8

Everything You Need to Throw a Basketball Party and a Recipe for Dairy-Free Creamy Jalapeno Ranch Dip

Prep Time: 15 minutes
Total Time: 15 minutes

A creamy dip that's like ranch, but totally vegan. And a little spicy. Because spicy = fun.


  • 4 teaspoons dried dill weed
  • 4 teaspoons onion powder
  • 4 teaspoons dried onion flakes
  • 3 teaspoons salt
  • 4 teaspoons garlic powder
  • 1 teaspoon ground pepper
  • 4 cups coconut milk cream, separated in half (refrigerate cans overnight and then open and scoop out cream)
  • 2 tblspn apple cider vinegar
  • 1 cup canned jalapeños
  • 1 cup canned salsa verde, green salsa for you non-spanish speakers out there, you


  1. Take half of your coconut milk cream and strain it through a thin piece of fabric. You're trying to thicken it, so squeeze as much water out as you can without completely demolishing it. Remember, you'll be mixing it back into the other half, so don't be scared. Squeeze away.
  2. Mix your squeezed coconut milk cream back into your un-squeezed and add the vinegar.
  3. Allow to sit for about 10 minutes.
  4. Mix-in all of the spices, jalapenos and salsa verde.
  5. Using a blender or a food processor, grind it all up lightly.
  6. Scoop-out and serve.
  7. Mmmmm...

So, basically, this is the best dairy-free ranch dressing–and that kick? So good. Totally made the wings a little zingier and the chips…whoo. So, try it. You’ll love it.

Anything else you think I might need to add to my list of Everything You Need for a Basketball Party list? I’d love to hear back from you–just leave me a comment below! And don’t forget to stock-up on your Nexium before your party. You want to be prepared for the spontaneous moment when the b-ball tension just gets you!

Thank you for sharing!



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